Today, bookstores are full of books on psychology. And the department of the bookstore, where they are sold, can only be compared in popularity with the department of detective literature, where the shelves are lined with bright volumes of books by Daria Dontsova and Tatiana Polyakova. Even sentimental love stories faded into the background. And the world of fantasy is completely resting on the sidelines.
But psychology is a subtle science. And if there will be no harm from reading a book that tells about various techniques that will definitely help to achieve success, except for wasted time, then you can suffer from their use. It is worth reading only high-quality literature, preferably time-tested. Consider a small selection of the best books on psychology and psychotherapy in the context of their areas of application.
Content
- 1 What is psychology and how does it differ from psychotherapy
- 2 Psychology books for everyone and for everyone
- 2.1 Best books on communication psychology
- 2.2 "Games People Play. People who play games ", Eric Berne
- 2.3 How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie
- 2.4 “Don't growl at the dog! A book about training people, animals, and yourself, "Karen Pryor
- 2.5 "Grandmaster of Communication", Sergey Deryabo
- 3 Books on child psychology
- 3.1 “How to speak so that children listen, and how to listen so that children speak”, Elaine Mazlish, Adele Faber
- 3.2 “Communicate with the child. How? ", Yulia Borisovna Gippenreiter
- 3.3 "The Big Book of the" Lazy Mom ", Anna Bykova
- 3.4 "Secret support: attachment in the life of a child", Lyudmila Petranovskaya
- 4 Books on the psychology of relationships between men and women
What is psychology and how does it differ from psychotherapy
Psychology is a science that studies aspects of the behavior of people among their own kind. Today it is more relevant than ever. The social circle is growing rapidly. Spouses, children and parents, bosses and subordinates, sellers and buyers, drivers and pedestrians, employees of all kinds of authorities - this is just a small fraction of the people with whom you have to contact every day. And in order to achieve the desired result, everyone needs their own approach.
It is worth adding here and tough informational pressure, because every day a person has to assimilate more and more information. And the frantic pace of life. I didn't have time, I couldn't, I didn't prevent it, I was late, I didn't think it through. The mass of "not" negatively affects the psychological state. And together with other problems it leads to psychological disorders. Here psychotherapy comes into play. With the help of various methods of therapeutic influence on the human psyche, it helps to improve his emotional state, to establish broken social ties, to get rid of complexes and give self-confidence. In principle, the last two points are also available in practical psychology.
Not a single book, even the most popular book by the best author, can cure diseases such as depression or neurosis. The problem is that it is difficult for an ordinary person who is not associated with psychiatry to grasp the line where discomfort is caused by overwork or minor troubles at work, and where the doctor's help is already needed.
Therefore, books on psychology are, of course, worth reading, but hopes that they will become that same magic pill - no.Moreover, to obtain a tangible result, you need to work a lot on yourself.
Psychology books for everyone and for everyone
Among the criteria for choosing a book on psychology, one of the most important is the target audience. There are bestsellers that should be read by all fans of the genre that reflect the problems in communication very well, divide them into groups and help to find answers to many questions. But sometimes narrower literature is also needed. Is there a teenager in the house? A three-year-old child is out of control and her husband gets out of hand? Relationships with the opposite sex are not going well? It is worth trying to find the answer to the eternal question "What to do?" And knowing the answer is practically the solution to most problems.
Best books on communication psychology
Everyone knows the feeling when it's still early morning, and the white light is no longer nice. Because there are a lot of things to do, several meetings, negotiations, a boss dissatisfied with everything at work, and conflicts, conflicts, conflicts. And the lack of prospects for growth and development. In this case, it will not be superfluous to read one of the many books on the psychology of communication with people.
"Games People Play. People who play games ", Eric Berne
One of the best classic examples for fans of the psychological genre. In the middle of the last century, she headed all kinds of ratings for almost two years, and her circulation was regularly reprinted. What is its main meaning. We all play our roles. Someone more, someone less. Some out of habit, others for the purpose of deriving benefits. Thinking and living within the framework of certain stereotypes sometimes makes it difficult to take a sober look at the situation, evaluate it, draw conclusions and start living outside the framework and clichés. Why, if a woman, then an excellent housewife and loving mother. And a man is necessarily successful. The book contains 120 situations or peculiar games that adults play.
Advantages:
- The book is read in one breath;
- It contains many examples from everyday life;
- Provides practical advice on how to recognize manipulation and prevent it from happening in your relationship.
Disadvantages:
- In the opinion of the readers, the book does little to touch upon the psychological aspects.
And yes, it is not bad to be able to manipulate people, but in practice it is worth applying these skills only as a last resort. There will always be someone who has perfected these skills much better. And nobody likes to lose.
How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie
Another classic option. The generation of today's 40s learned to live and communicate in the new post-Soviet reality with the books of this author. More than twenty years have passed, but his advice is still valid. By the way, Carnegie himself corrected his publications several times, bringing them in line with the new realities. Most importantly, his books do not teach how to manipulate, they teach to understand the interlocutor and feel the situation. And on the basis of this, choose your line of behavior, which will make your opponent interested in you and your opinion.
Advantages:
- The book is easy to read;
- Written in accessible language;
- Affects aspects such as lack of confidence in one's own abilities, inability to please others and win their attention;
- Great for both bosses and subordinates to read.
Disadvantages:
- The classics rarely have flaws, but perhaps they are slightly outdated.
Dale Carnegie's postulates are pretty simple. Smile, politeness, friendliness. And they still work.
“Don't growl at the dog! A book about training people, animals, and yourself, "Karen Pryor
An ambiguous book, but also quite useful. Teaches you how to get your opponent to fulfill your wish. Moreover, not only to fulfill, but also to enjoy it. It can be viewed as a reference book for a leader or a parent. After all, it is much more pleasant for a subordinate to hear praise than regular reproaches. However, like a child.Deuce again? Well done. After all, there was a stake yesterday. But first of all, this book will help you understand your inner world and stop growling about and without it.
Advantages:
- An interesting book that raises many questions;
- Specific situations are considered;
- Teaches you to keep emotions under control.
Disadvantages:
- In the opinion of readers, the content is somewhat one-sided;
- It is the psychology of attitudes that is poorly disclosed, or the reasons for these or those actions.
People quickly get used to good things. At one point, praise can become commonplace. Or they will start manipulating you in an attempt to get rewards. You should be careful.
"Grandmaster of Communication", Sergey Deryabo
One of the new products from the Russian publishing house. The most important skill in communication is the ability to listen and hear the interlocutor. And if you still learn to perceive not only words, but also facial expressions, tone, hand movements and much more, then you can easily understand what the interlocutor wanted to keep silent about. A wonderful trump card up the sleeve, both in business communication and in not too pleasant conversation in everyday life.
Advantages:
- Quite an exciting book with many illustrations;
- The content is replete with examples of controversial situations and a detailed analysis of ways out of them;
- Teaches you to hear the interlocutor and build a conversation correctly so that your opinion is heard.
Disadvantages:
- More like a business communication tutorial than a psychology book.
The book will really become an excellent assistant if conflict situations arise regularly against the background of misunderstanding, lack of communication skills.
Books on child psychology
A lot of popular literature has been published on this topic. Not all of them are easy to read, many are replete with scientific terms. Editions of foreign authors are often not applicable to our conditions. Nevertheless, there is a choice.
“How to speak so that children listen, and how to listen so that children speak”, Elaine Mazlish, Adele Faber
One of the few foreign textbooks on child psychology, which in 2018 became the sales leader among publications of this kind. The book perfectly reveals the secrets of how to learn to hear your child. Very often, tantrums of younger children and complete disregard for the opinions of adults in adolescents is a way to reach out to the closest people with their troubles. It is no secret that what is a trifle for a wise person, for a child is a huge tragedy.
Advantages:
- Fascinating presentation of the material, available not only to parents, but also to their children;
- The book provides a detailed analysis of conflict situations;
- Helps parents to better understand the physiological and psychological stages of development;
- The authors talk about effective parenting methods based on trust and mutual understanding, not punishment;
- The book will be useful for teenagers to read. Perhaps they will understand that their parents are motivated by good intentions.
Disadvantages:
- Some psychological techniques are of little use in our upbringing system.
Despite its minor flaws, the book is a great place to start building relationships between juniors and seniors to the next level.
“Communicate with the child. How? ", Yulia Borisovna Gippenreiter
A popular book from a Russian author. Its popularity is well deserved. The book is divided into two parts. In the second, the author gives an example of the transformation of his grandson from a difficult teenager into a young man with his own system of values, authority, aspirations and desires. We can say that the author herself went through a difficult period when a sweet and obedient baby turns into a real tyrant of the whole family.
Advantages:
- The book is divided into blocks, each of which is accompanied by control questions and test tasks;
- The author describes in detail the background of certain actions and gives specific recommendations on how to respond to them.
Disadvantages:
- The book is definitely not for reading in transport. She will demand attention. But, this can hardly be called a drawback.
Not so long ago, a book by the author was published entitled “We continue to communicate with the child. So?". It is interesting to read the author's reflections and, together with her, try to resolve this or that conflict situation.
"The Big Book of the" Lazy Mom ", Anna Bykova
Very often, excessive anxiety and the mother's desire to control everything and everything turns into big problems. And if with preschoolers these are only problems of mothers, then later they will invariably develop into who are the problems of a grown-up child. Sometimes the only way to get rid of overprotection for him is to escape from the family.
Advantages:
- The book provides methods and ways to get rid of anxiety;
- Careful reading and application of her advice will allow you to raise an independent child who will not get confused in a difficult situation and will confidently enter adulthood.
Disadvantages:
- Don't blindly follow advice. It is worth navigating by the child. It is likely that he is not yet ready psychologically for independence.
It is pleasant to be a “lazy” mother, but one should not forget that, despite being independent, he still needs love and care. Even if he is 20 years old, and he has long outgrown his parents. There must be a reliable support in the life of every person. As long as possible.
"Secret support: attachment in the life of a child", Lyudmila Petranovskaya
Lyudmila Petranovskaya is the author of a whole series of books on child psychology. This book is for aspiring moms. It tells how important it is to correctly form the basic social and psychological ties between parents and children in the first years of life. To become for the child not only a support, but also an authority.
Advantages:
- The book is written in an accessible language;
- Its content, tips and tricks will help young families through the difficult period of becoming real parents.
Disadvantages:
- The focus of the publication on a narrow circle of readers.
Everyone wants to see their children as successful, self-confident individuals. This path cannot be passed without conflicts, quarrels and reproaches, because a child is immediately born as a person with his own character. It is worth treating it as an exciting adventure, 18 or more years in length. By the way, personality formation goes through disputes and defending one's opinion. Any book on child psychology will confirm this.
Books on the psychology of relationships between men and women
Everyone wants to be loved and happy. Not everyone knows how. It's easy to learn, it's hard to constantly work on yourself and relationships. A man and a woman are very different, which is why they are attracted to each other.
"Man and Woman", Mikhail Litvak
A well-known Russian author dedicated one of his books to the relationship between a man and a woman. In it, he reveals the differences between male and female perception of the world and immediately finds points of contact.
Advantages:
- The book is easy to read, suitable for both women and men;
- It helps to get rid of complexes, learn to hear your soul mate and stop conflicting.
Disadvantages:
- An excellent book for successful married couples. But not suitable for young people who are on the verge of starting a family.
They say that family relationships are constant work. Maybe we should turn them into pleasure.
"Mistakes of love, or 10 ways to ruin a relationship with a man", Elena Antonovich
The book is intended for a female audience. From its content, they will learn how to choose the right man and win his attention. And how not to spoil the relationship.
Advantages:
- An exciting book with light humor;
- Describes the main aspects of male psychology;
- By example, all the signs of a man who cannot become a reliable life companion have been analyzed.
Disadvantages:
- Designed only for a female audience.
If there is a book for women, then there must be a book for men about the secrets of "female logic".
"Woman. A Guide for Men, Douglas Abrams, Rachel Carlton Abrams, John Gottman, Julie Schwartz-Gottman
An excellent guide for men that will reveal all the secrets of a subtle female soul. Moreover, as evidence of many facts, quite scientific evidence is given. The book touches upon not only the psychological aspects of women's behavior, but also quite material ones related to the hormonal background.
Dignity:
- Easy to read;
- Fun and addictive;
- The book will help you better understand a woman, her behavior and logic.
Disadvantages:
- It is worth reading in private. Women may well get to the publication and learn a lot from it.
Psychology books today have become a real magic wand, which will not only help to get to know each other and teach mutual understanding, but will help to achieve success both in the family field and in business. But not a single book will teach you to love, make friends, and treat children and parents with all the attention. And also, admit your defeats and not praise your victories.
Most recently, I bought a book by Eric Berne called Games People Play. I agree with the description of the book in the article. The author tried to convey the information in easy language. I'll take a few books from the article for a note. The topic of relationships with people, as well as between the sexes, is very interesting.